Rednecks annoy me––oh so much. Their food annoys me also, though I don't know whether the people or the food annoys me worse. Here is the article I've written to put into the local paper (so much freedom is given to newspaper interns. I'm hoping I don't get glares from my editors, glares from my parents––ironically, my family are Northerners––or glares via printed word from the newspaper's readership: though that would be some sort of excitement in this otherwise dull town).
Turn on the mischief and try something out of the ordinary. Over the last several years, cafés have opened in Carroll County. Many of these have failed and had to close. Why? Lack of business.
This area of the country is dedicated to a solid diet of biscuits and gravy, steak and potatoes, hot dogs and burgers, beer and coffee. These foods are cultural, they are this area's heritage, and there is nothing wrong with them. However, the world of food is wider than just gravy on a pancake. Bagels, light sandwiches, and croissants paired with exotic drinks (aka, not straight black coffee: perhaps an espresso?). Attempt an out-of-the-ordinary experience. Support local small businesses. Eat a scone and drink a delicate cup of white tea from one of the local tea shops. Galax offers the Stringbean Coffee shop and Shamrock Tea Room, the Chestnut Creek Coffee House, and the Cones-and-Coffee Café (the pimento cheese sandwich on rye is divine). Hillsville seems to have nothing in the way of lighter, healthier fare (let's avoid diabetes, shall we?), but someone should fix that.
Therefore, newspaper readers of Carroll County, try something a bit more urbane and European. Munch on a scone and sip some hot tea from the fantastic local cafés in this area.
This piece was originally written for publication in the Carroll County News.
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